we killed the last of its kind….

It was a dark and stormy night when Skip and Epigene valiantly flung their sinister bombers into the unforgiving darkness of space against uncounted, unforeseen and unfathomable foes.

[screech]

Try again, save the RP stuff for later.  So, Skip and I log in roughly at the same time and while PI does have its appeal, (ISK!), we decide to roam the neighborhood of our C2 Wormhole space.  Its been rather busy – our corporation bookmarks tell tales of stalked POS es, vanished Wormholes and routes leading into nowhere.  But they are old bookmarks and we set out to refresh our knowledge using our trusted (and easy to replace!) scouty bombers.  A C2 leading to nullsec, low sec another C2 and a C5.  All empty. There is a C5 left.  We go in and poke around.

There is a mystique about flying into a C5 or C6 as if they were more dangerous than a C1.  But personally, I am more apprehensive of jumping into a C3 which likely has a active and blood thirsty corporation rather than a C6 that functions more like nullsec with defined CTAs and long times of nothing at all.  And they all wear their space pants the same way.  PI and mining works the same in all WHs….

Anyway.  Skip and I go into the C5 and see – nothing.   Its a mightily big system though and he checks out the inner planets, I warp to the very outer planet, it has only one moon and rather than scan, I just select the moon, engage a warp to 100 and get ready for a long warp with nothing to show for.

Well, that was the plan.

During warp, I periodically update d-scan and all of a sudden see more warp disruptor bubbles that there are scammers in Jita.  Seriously, my overview is several pages nothing but bubbles and they can only be in once place and thats the moon I am about to land on.

Oops.

Still in warp, I say good-bye to my shiny bomber, it served me well, still has someone’s corpse in the cargo hold and brace for impact.  I land 20 km away from the largest bubble nest anyone has ever created.

Like soap in a bathtub after eating beans, like chewing gum after a vicious vindaloo, these bubbles seem organic, self sustained and will – if unchecked – truly take over the universe.

Ain’t she pretty?  Now bubbles without anything floating junk scare the crap out of me but in my bomber its relatively harmless – the probability of getting decloaked is not very high.  So I relax and enjoy the view while I motor away to make a safe spot for Skip – this scenery has to be shared.

Oh look.  There is a ship inside that mess.  How did it get in there? Skip is curious but I ask him to hold position on the other side of the solar system for a second.  This system is enormous.  It does not help to have both scouts in the same d-scan envelope envelope.  And when the ship starts moving again, my heart rate goes up, my breathing slows and goes deep and my vision zooms in.  We are on the hunt.  The pilot moves towards a ship array and changes into a Primae.

A what? 

Yes, I had to look it up also.  A Primae is – at first glance – a Noctis with paintjob.  It was apparently designed by CCP as a dedicated Planetary Interaction ship but its pathetic statistics relegated it to novelty status.  I have never seen one in the wild.  This may be the last of its kind.  And we are on the prowl…

Anyway, the Pilot puts the pedal to the metal and aligns, and warps to a planet, its unambiguous which one, and I call for Skip to warp to their customs office asap.  I too turn my bomber around and engage warp.  Yes, it may be the last of its kind but I want its head mounted over my fireplace.  If we ever get WiS in our POS….

Skip’s and my bomber warp much faster than this industrial relic and we land well before him, in fact, I get worried that I got his warp direction wrong.

But I didn’t and the little Primae faceplants into the customs office and stares blankly int the Skip’s and my wide-open torpedo launchers.    2 Stealthbombers at point-blank range put out a lot of hurtin’ and I only get the 2 salvos off before the ship goes poof.

The last of its kind. Good bye Primae – you were not fit to live, bear your extinction with honor.

The pod warps away and I after him – I wonder how he gets into his bubble nest – while Skip reviews the salvage for tasty morsels.  Nothing!  Nothing at all!  The poor sod had 4 warp stabilizers fitted but to no avail.  Without tank, this thing blows up like a fat bug on the windscreen of an 18 wheeler.

While Skip and I cheer for the pure joy of having conducted a text-book-perfect takedown, I am slightly concerned that we just extinct a species from New Eden.  This may have been the last of its kind and it demised on the business end of our torpedoes.  Will I ever sleep again?  Will Greenpeace name-and-shame me for my atrocities? Will I have to change my profession, become an industrialist, find the last remaining blueprint and create a herd of these marvelous but useless beasts?  Will David Attenborough ever forgive me?

Don’t change the channel, more after the commercial break…

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10 responses to “we killed the last of its kind….

  1. Fantastic post! I literally giggled like a girl (while at work reading the post) as you described the Primae. It was like reading National Geographic Magazine with the Crocodile Hunter Steve Erwin narrating in my mind. Look at her. She a real beauty in her natural bubbly environment. Now I’m gonna pound her species into extinction. Epic post sir.

  2. There would be a huge number of those ships around – stored away in station containers like I have mine. The idea was to allow new pilots to try PI when it was first released, without having to train up a suitable industrial hull. 95% * of pilots could already fly a more effective ship for the task, so you never saw them used much.

    ( * that statistic is 100% made up)

    • I was there – when PI came out – and I can’t remember this ship. I was using an Exequror for PI runs since I could not fly Ittys yet. How I missed getting one of these marvelous beasts, I do not know… I am glad to hear that others are in captivity for breeding purposes so Skip and can not be blamed for killing the last of its kind….

      • CCP aren’t that great at alerting players on how to select and collect the gifts they occasionally give. Even so, maybe you got one and just don’t remember, because they were rarely used. It’s maybe worth checking through your assets–and then forgetting about it again.

  3. Laughed so hard when I saw that hull. Lost mine the week Tyrannis dropped, excited that this thing was a whole lot faster than my Itty, and had a huge P.I. specific cargohold. Can’t say I remember the m3 or if the expanders worked to increase that amount, but the hermit is right in its obsoleteness, besides becoming a relic. That was my first visit to low sec to pick up the fruit of my labor, having set up the whole grid the past few days, when it was not the weekend and quiet as a mouse.

    • I am starting to think I need to get me one now. I mean, it is useless, of course but it would make a pretty hangar queen…

      • I still have mine, think I even collected PI in it once. That was long before I moved into wormholes though.

        Am not sure it makes a “pretty” hanger queen. Like the noctis, it ain’t a pretty beast.

  4. Pingback: Dueling « A Miner's Trip

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