The first installment of my quick series how to live in EVE’s wormhole space. It is not really a guide, more a personal journal. Comments are very welcome.
Most EVE players live in empire space – only small minority only is part of the elusive Wormhole Club. And the first few days in our space quickly show recruits why we are so few. If you are not paranoid, you are dead and if you are dead, people laugh at you and you can’t make ISK. So, paranoia is a valid strategy. I must admit, I take this to a different level compared to other guides and a lot of what I will be writing about won’t be necessary to lead a healthy, fat life in Wormhole space. But some of it may become useful – and if only even to deride me for timidness…
First rule, you are never alone…. The absence of the local channel is noted by recruits on Day 1 = Wreck 1 when they linger on the Customs office planning their future PI riches. They had no idea someone else was there until their armor alarm goes off. Similarly, recruits with industrial aspirations will inevitably warp to an ore site and go slack-jawed by the size of the asteroids – oh, the wealth if they could only get it to Jita. And with a whistle on their lips they uncrate the prized Hulk, put on their hard hat and train lasers onto those rocks, dreaming about the amazing things they will buy next. But before the first cycle is done, they wake up in a brand new clone, the mail icon sarcastically blinking.
So, shamelessly changing the words of Colonel Quaritch:
You are not in Kansas anymore. You are [in a wormhole], ladies and gentlemen. Respect that fact every second of every day. If there is a Hell, you might wanna go there for some R & R after a tour [in this C2]. Out there beyond that [bubble] every living thing that crawls, flies, or squats in the mud wants to kill you and eat your eyes for jujubes.
Secondly on the list of big wonders to the recruits is just how hard it is to get around. Forget that everything out there wants to kill you, in empire space your routes don’t change, there are belts, rats, agents, missions and Concord. We don’t have any of this of course and our sleepers hit harder than anything in empire space and offer neither escalations, nor bounty nor officer loot. You want it, you have to scan it down yourself.
While some recruits fail at this point and run back to the security of null security space, most do not. The no-holds barred, zero-politics and zero-forgiveness environment of Wormhole space has its appeal. Freed from CTAs, the sea of blue fish and stifling corp doctrine rookie explorers set out to make their own mistakes, learn their own lessons and learn to move around in this dark world with the confidence of a woman walking the aisles of her favorite supermarket (*). All they have to do is to develop that sixth sense that keeps their ships intact and their wallets full.
The next few short chapters will describe my approach to some of the issues wormholers face when left alone. Or maybe alone. That is after all the big question….
(*) I have been dying to get a sexist joke into this blog. But there was never an opportunity. Women don’t play computer games. Or read game blogs. Or read anything but their husband’s secret desires. And that’s the way we like them. Oh yes.